In our continuing coverage of the sham that is the Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt union: ring watch! (Because it’s Wednesday).

When the two stinking fame-whores got off the plane from their Mexican-cum-nuptials getaway, absolutely NO RINGS were on those fingers. It was like they forgot that the paparazzi would be waiting for them, which is highly unlike these two. Maybe they didn’t have time to get rings before they were wed. Like they were sitting on the beach, reading US Weekly before Spencer turned to Heidi and said: “You know what would get us in here? If we got married.”

And she was like: “Ha ha ha!, yeah!, hilarious!,” because Heidi Montag talks in non-conclusive exclamation points.

Whatever. When the two showed up for the “Road To A Cure” benefit, they had rings, but not awesome ones, suggesting that Spencer Pratt really is as poor as he deserves to be or that the only place they could think of to get rings on such short notice was at a Claire’s at the nearby mall.

Someone just stop taking photos of these two, and we’re guessing they’ll just disappear.

[SPLASH]