Mitch Winehouse, the father of perpetual drug bucket that is actually making Pete Doherty look like the “male Amy Winehouse,” has announced that his daughter is suffering from the early stages of emphysema. She does not HAVE Emphysema, but if she doesn’t stop smoking and hitting the crack rock, she’s gonna die.

Yes, we have finally got to that point, where doctors are point-blank telling Amy Winehouse that “this is it.” Not “you really shouldn’t,” but “you really can’t if you ever want to see 45.”

“With smoking the crack cocaine and the cigarettes her lungs are all gunked up,” Mitch Winehouse tells Britain’s Sunday Mirror. “There are nodules around the chest and dark marks. She’s got 70 percent lung capacity.”

But have no fear! She knows now (because all the run-ins with the law and leaked videos of her doing crack and heroin weren’t wake-up-calls enough): “She’s smothered in nicotine patches. She’s responding brilliantly to treatment. She’s actually flourishing,” says Dad.

Um…flourishing? Let’s just hope she lives long enough to jones her way through Crackmas.